The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
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