At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
home. puking in laundry basket.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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