i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Randomize