I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
