:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Randomize
