After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
