Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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