i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
