maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize