So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
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