I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
