I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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