fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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