I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
