what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Terrible idea I love it
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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