I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
my mouth tastes like poor choices
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
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