Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
