Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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