Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
