Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Randomize
