I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I can't trust your balls anymore.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
So. Much. Porn.
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