Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
i believe in u and ur pee
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
