You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Is Oprah even human
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
