just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Let's paint friendship bongs
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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