I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
