Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Is it because I queefed?
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
