how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
