guys are only as good as the porn they watch
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
