its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
