bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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