You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
