she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
