I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
