The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
