Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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