no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Randomize
