from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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