I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
