Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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