You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
