you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize