Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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