You're completely useless in the revolution.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Send help, water and tortillas.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
