Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
