they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
