no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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