i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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