She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
My cat gives me a boner
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
