i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
