I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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