...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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