problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I think my fart just growled at me.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
